"Lvl-up, the russian roulette way!"

December 19th, 2009, 7:22 pm



Edit December 19th, 2009, 7:25 pm

Hey, welcome back. After a significant pause, they're back! What? Why, the "Continuous Fantasy" rants, of course!

Pretty much any gamer has heard of "Final Fantasy VII: Crisis Core", on the PSP. Known by many as the best PSP game... and what kind of a ranter would I be, if I didn't make something about it?

To those who didn't understood this rant, I'll explain: during the game, more precisely during the battles (which take place in real time), a mechanism similar to a slot-machine, called D.M.W. (Digital Mind Wave), will appear on screen. Each of the three slots will contain both a number, and a face of one of the game's characters. Depending on which combination you get, you'll get different results. And THAT is where things get ugly...

For example, if you get "7-7-7" on the number slots, Zack (the game's main character) levels up! That's right, people! On this game, level-up is nothing less than PURE FUCKIN' RANDOM!!! There are no EXP bars, no damn indication of WHEN will your character level-up... BECAUSE IT'S RANDOM!!!

I mean, I don't have anything against systems that try to run away from the norms, but at the very least make something that can be MEASURED! Just look at "The Elder Scrolls" series. The way you gather EXP is different than most RPGs, but it's still there, you can see it, and you can ALWAYS see how much is left for the next level!

And you think random level-up isn't bad enough?! Then what about random LIMIT BREAKS?! As I said, each slot is composed of both a number, and a character's face. Depending on what set of faces do you get, Zack will perform a certain Limit Break (pretty much a super-attack). For example, if you get three Sephiroths, Zack will perform an Octoslash.

Some may argue that this system was made to reflect Zack's memories, and he does the Limit breaks because he "remembers" the corresponding character in the middle of a battle, but you know what? I DON'T FUCKIN' CARE, ok?! That D.M.W. is nothing more than a broken system Square came up with, just to claim that they're different. Well, it's different, alright... FOR THE WORST! Not being able to know when does my character level up?! Not being able to CHOOSE my own Limit Breaks?! Is this some sort of a joke? Is this something you, yes YOU, if you were a game designer, would put on a videogame? If your answer is "yes", then your head is pretty much as broken as Square's developers'.

And don't get me started on the raw battle controls. You know those automatic lock-on systems, that NEVER target the enemy YOU want to hit?! Yeah, exactly!
Not to mention that as soon as you press "X" (the game's attack button), the character automatically targets a random enemy, and simply CHARGES at it! Would you call this a full-action RPG?! Hell no! Yes, you get to block and dodge on your own... but trust me, the enemies are stupid to the point that you'll rarely need those!

Anyway, that's too long for just one rant, so I'll leave it at that.

Edit July 17th, 2019, 6:20 am


blog comments powered by Disqus


Fontes' Rants is hosted by Smack Jeeves, and is a part of Ranter Works.

The Webcomic List Comic Rank